The Emotion:
My day has sucked, really most of this last week has sucked...I am just being real here after all that is the title of my blog. It all started with my dad's heart issue which got the emotions rolling, then Jacob got a cold while we were in Waco and he quit sleeping more than a couple of hours at a time and exhaustion started to set in, the cold took a hold of my head and I had a few days of feeling like a freight train slammed into my face and still no sleep. Jacob's cold is still going strong and so today I took him in to the doctor. At first they thought he had RSV which was a little terrifying, then she decided we would be buying a nebulizer and doing breathing treatments three times a day over the weekend. I waited at the pharmacy for almost a half hour with both kids just to be told they were out of nebulizers. My doctor called the pharmacy a bit later and they said there was some confusion and they did in fact have a nubulizer and I should come back and pick it up. When I got to the pharmacy it was discovered that our insurance does not cover some of the things prescribed and a huge chunk of change was handed over to get Jacob healthy again. Let's not forget that Allan is gone for four days on a guys weekend fishing out of state. AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
The Truth:
As I sat here tonight having a pity party a few things hit me straight in the heart and I decided that I needed to remind myself of the good things that have happened over the last week. My dad is alive and on the mend. I will have many more years to get on his nerves and make him laugh. Once I was honest about my exhaustion I had a neighbor offer to help out with Claire so I could get a nap, and good gracious what a great nap it was. Jacob does not have RSV or anything else seriously wrong with him, he has a cold for crying out loud. We have insurance and although it does not cover everything it does cover visits to the doctor when I need peace of mind and most medications. Although it tightens our budget for the month we were able to get the medications that will help our baby boy get better and hopefully sleep better. I have a husband that I can trust to spend four days with really great men and when he is home he is amazingly helpful and loving and caring.
Sometimes it is so easy to get wrapped up in the moment whether it is a good or bad moment and let your emotions take control. I was so glad that I made myself look at the bigger picture for a minute tonight and soak in the fact that life is really good overall. I have a hard weekend ahead of me, but nothing that I cannot make it through for goodness sake. I am pretty sure that this will be a lesson I will relearn many times over throughout the rest of my life.
5 comments:
Emily, that was a great post. I relate to so much of what you said. Being a Mom is tough work and perspective can help us set such a wonderful example for our children and other women around us when the going gets tough.
Personally I think being a Mom is one of the tools that God uses for our sanctification (becoming more like Christ and less like ourselves) as women and I think your post demonstrates this beautifully.
Hang in there!
I totally agree with Allison! When we view parenting (and marriage and life - for that matter) as a learning process that is refining us to be the child of God that He wants us to be, it takes some of the sting out of the pain. The exhaustion is still there, but you can handle that, Emily! You are tough! Just the fact that you were able to reflect on these things shows that you are learning, and that is such a good thing. The growing part is always painful, but afterwards it is so worth it! I am sorry that this has been a hard week. I wish that I could rescue you. I did love having Claire with us for a few hours today though. She is a funny girl! I pray that you get some rest tonight and throughout this weekend.
Those things are all so hard ... I'm glad you were able to find some perspective in the midst of it. That's not always an easy thing to find. I'll be praying for you this weekend.
Ugh! to the first part! And I'm SO PROUD OF YOU for the second part! You're doing a GREAT job!!! And you inspire me! Thanks for being one of the BEST sisters I could ever dream of!!! I love you!
Sweet Baby Doll, I love you so much and I rejoice in how God is always faithful to show us more of the big picture that is all about Him... when we let Him. I can so relate to everything you said. Well spoken dear girl.
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