**taken the day after Stella was bornLast Thursday morning I had the honor of watching a miracle happen before my very eyes. I watched my good friend Hannah deliver her second daughter, Stella, in her living room. I can hardly put into words what that experience was like for me, but I will try.
I should start before the big event I guess...Hannah and I have been building a great friendship over the last year and half. We are different in some ways: she eats kale, I eat Pringles; she has home births, I have my babies in the hospital with an epidural...you get the idea. We are the same in a lot of ways: we respect each others differences; we both love being moms and want what is best for our families; we like to be around each other. I have learned so much from her and hold so much respect for her, even before I witnessed her being a rock star in a pool in her living room, now my respect for her has soared.
A couple of months ago she asked me if I would be at her upcoming birth. I was shocked and SO excited! I had never been at a birth other than my own, but have always wanted to see a baby enter the world. I didn't know what to expect, I knew she was planning to have a water birth so I watched a few online just to prep myself. I lined up childcare about two weeks before her due date just in case she went into labor when Allan wasn't at home and then the waiting game began....we waited and waited and I was beginning to think Stella may never come ;)
At 1:45am Thursday morning my phone rang and it was Hannah's husband saying that she was contracting ever one to two minutes and that the midwives and family had been called. I bounced out of bed threw on some clothes and was out the door in about five minutes. I didn't want to miss any of the action. It turns out I was in more of a hurry than anyone else and was the first to show up. Hannah was laying on the couch chatting a bit in between contractions but for the most part the mood was very peaceful and focused.
The entire support team arrived and a few hours passed. We were pretty sure the baby would be born before the sun came up. We were wrong. She labored both in the water and out of the water. Watching her control, even when she thought she was out of control, was awesome. The house was pretty quite for the most part so she could focus and stay on top of the pain. The only word I can think of to describe the mood was almost reverent at times. I hated seeing her in pain, but knew that the work she was doing was going to be totally worth it once Stella arrived.
The big moment arrived around 8am, it was time to push. This is where the first BIG difference in between a hospital birth and a home birth happened (in my experience). There was a time or two where Hannah's husband said "why don't we just push?" and Hannah would say "I don't want to push I just want her to come." HUH?!? I pushed for 2.5 hours with Claire and 1.5 hours with Jacob, what the heck did she mean "let her come". Stella was crowning before Hannah pushed even once. Obviously she had to push a few times, everyone has to, but it was definitely a more natural process and not forced (I would love that experience).
Big difference #2 between a home birth and hospital birth would be the part after the baby is born. There was no rushing around, no taking the baby away from Hannah to get her stats and clean her up. Hannah held Stella while the placenta was delivered and after a bit they moved to the bed where she cuddled her new daughter and fed her. We all just sat around for about an hour before they even thought about weighing her, I was getting a little restless ;) Turns out she weighed in at 8lbs 10oz. A beautiful healthy baby girl. I loved her the moment I saw her and finally held her.
I am not sure Hannah will ever know what a gift it was to me allowing me to be there for Stella's birth. It was one of the greatest experiences of my life up to this point. It actually has given me a lot to think about before I have this third baby.
I should start before the big event I guess...Hannah and I have been building a great friendship over the last year and half. We are different in some ways: she eats kale, I eat Pringles; she has home births, I have my babies in the hospital with an epidural...you get the idea. We are the same in a lot of ways: we respect each others differences; we both love being moms and want what is best for our families; we like to be around each other. I have learned so much from her and hold so much respect for her, even before I witnessed her being a rock star in a pool in her living room, now my respect for her has soared.
A couple of months ago she asked me if I would be at her upcoming birth. I was shocked and SO excited! I had never been at a birth other than my own, but have always wanted to see a baby enter the world. I didn't know what to expect, I knew she was planning to have a water birth so I watched a few online just to prep myself. I lined up childcare about two weeks before her due date just in case she went into labor when Allan wasn't at home and then the waiting game began....we waited and waited and I was beginning to think Stella may never come ;)
At 1:45am Thursday morning my phone rang and it was Hannah's husband saying that she was contracting ever one to two minutes and that the midwives and family had been called. I bounced out of bed threw on some clothes and was out the door in about five minutes. I didn't want to miss any of the action. It turns out I was in more of a hurry than anyone else and was the first to show up. Hannah was laying on the couch chatting a bit in between contractions but for the most part the mood was very peaceful and focused.
The entire support team arrived and a few hours passed. We were pretty sure the baby would be born before the sun came up. We were wrong. She labored both in the water and out of the water. Watching her control, even when she thought she was out of control, was awesome. The house was pretty quite for the most part so she could focus and stay on top of the pain. The only word I can think of to describe the mood was almost reverent at times. I hated seeing her in pain, but knew that the work she was doing was going to be totally worth it once Stella arrived.
The big moment arrived around 8am, it was time to push. This is where the first BIG difference in between a hospital birth and a home birth happened (in my experience). There was a time or two where Hannah's husband said "why don't we just push?" and Hannah would say "I don't want to push I just want her to come." HUH?!? I pushed for 2.5 hours with Claire and 1.5 hours with Jacob, what the heck did she mean "let her come". Stella was crowning before Hannah pushed even once. Obviously she had to push a few times, everyone has to, but it was definitely a more natural process and not forced (I would love that experience).
Big difference #2 between a home birth and hospital birth would be the part after the baby is born. There was no rushing around, no taking the baby away from Hannah to get her stats and clean her up. Hannah held Stella while the placenta was delivered and after a bit they moved to the bed where she cuddled her new daughter and fed her. We all just sat around for about an hour before they even thought about weighing her, I was getting a little restless ;) Turns out she weighed in at 8lbs 10oz. A beautiful healthy baby girl. I loved her the moment I saw her and finally held her.
I am not sure Hannah will ever know what a gift it was to me allowing me to be there for Stella's birth. It was one of the greatest experiences of my life up to this point. It actually has given me a lot to think about before I have this third baby.
3 comments:
Beautiful post Emily. Just beautiful! I love you.
What a cool experience! By the way, even with a hospital birth, you can ask them to delay taking the baby for the weighing, Vit K, etc. My dad is an OB and a huge believer that the baby should just be with its mama for a prolonged period after birth.
Glad you got to have that experience! I've actually never been at anyone else's birth!
Emily, that was a great post! I loved hearing how it was fron the observer's point of view. It also made me so excited as I was also asked back in January to attend a friend's birth (their 1st child) along with her husband who will be her Bradley coach. They will be delivering in a hospital and since we had a natural birth in the hospital she asked me to be his back up coach (doula).
My friend is due any week now and I'm on pins and needles!
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